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Moving forward In the aftermath of discovering your husband’s online world, it is perfectly understandable that you might feel disgusted and betrayed and to worry as to how much you can trust your husband.

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To continue with this process you may wish to seek marriage counselling ( relationshipsireland.com, accord.ie).

There is a good chance of success for the two of you, if your husband accepts responsibility for what he has done and if the two of you are willing to work hard on improving your marriage.

I feel a bit betrayed and worry about whether I can trust him.

When I spoke to him again about it, he did apologise and said he won’t do it again but he then came out with a load of stuff about how unhappy he was in the marriage, that we never spend time together (which is true), but I don’t think it is fair for him to blame me.

Relationship counselling agencies report that a growing number of couples are now seeking help due to infidelity online or to one partner accessing adult websites.

How much of a problem it is, depends on the degree and type of access and what it means in the context of the marriage.Such intimacy is built on communication and friendship and leads to deep affection and a satisfying sex life.However, creating this intimacy is hard work and much harder than the easy escapism of the internet or watching TV or even over-working or domestic chores.There is a big difference between a person occasionally viewing pornography with the knowledge and even involvement of their partner to a full-blown betrayal and using adult websites to start affairs with other people.Like many problems, it can start innocently at first, with a person visiting sexually titillating sites perhaps out of boredom or a seeking escapism but then it can escalate to other behaviours, such as directly communicating with other people online and over time can become addictive and harmful.To move forward, it is important that you continue to talk to your husband and try to understand the extent of his difficulties and what the underlying issues are for him.

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